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Updated: Apr 12, 2021

How to win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

As we strive to learn and grow each day in our career and personal lives, we come across innumerable self-help books which have an unending array of data and statistics. We get to know what strategy to follow, what training to undertake or what skills to incorporate to be the best in every field. The competition is so intense that people somehow forget to look around and sense the obvious. Yes, the obvious! The identical creatures around them - People! Why we never think of them? By doing so we are unintentionally neglecting ourselves. The book “How to win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie is one of a kind and states the things that we have been avoiding since time immemorial.

I am glad that I came across this book. The book lays down various principles of human interaction which you may follow to become successful in any and every field you belong to. Whether you are a corporate and want to strike a deal or you are a homemaker and want the relationships in your house to bloom in every way possible, this book is for you. Unlike most of the non-fiction books which repeat the instances to stress on a single point, this book stands apart. I would like to talk over few points and will keep some unsaid for all my readers to discover. When we want some task done by any person, we command and seldom request. It is very rare to see that the people who are in authority ever acknowledge their subordinates, let alone appreciate them. However, the book suggests that instead of enforcing a task on a person, it would be great if we could ask them to do it without commanding them and bringing up the good that person has done earlier no matter how insignificant it was. This would satisfy the person’s ego and you can vouch that the person will do the task with double the efficiency. Isn’t it a small practice we could inculcate and see the wonderful results? Sure, we can!

Another, instance or excerpt which struck me was the need to apologize and avoid unnecessary conflicts. How many times have we found ourselves in petty fights and lost our mind amidst that only to learn later that it wasn’t worth it? If you are wrong, admit it before someone accuses you. If you are right but the other person is too adamant to give up on his beliefs, just accept to avoid the unnecessary conflicts and try to make your point differently later. This will not only restore your mental peace but also allow the other person to accept his/ her mistake, if not now, then sometimes later. Be patient with the people as you would be to the most important things in your life.

We, humans, have been bestowed with one super-power unlike other creatures and that is “Empathy”. Why don’t we use it for our best? Things can take a different turn if a person empathizes and steps into the shoes of the other person. Taking a genuine interest in people and getting connected with them can go a long way. History is the evidence of this. Rulers who connected with their people are still remembered over those who won the world with their muscular strength.

Having said that, I do not need to preach anymore about the book and the wonders it can do if applied in real life. I guess many people would have read this book already but for those who haven’t, it is a steal. This book is for any and everyone and could be kept as a bible when it comes to dealing with people. So, go grab a copy for yourself and grow with the people around!

Happy Reading!

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1 Comment

vaishnavi kale
vaishnavi kale
Feb 10, 2022


I love the way go write a whole book in a one go and I was already looking for the short summary of the book and it gives me the whole picture about the book.

waiting for more such reviews in future

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